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10
Steps to School Year Success
By Katie Basson
One of the most important aspects of parenting is ensuring that
your child gets a good education. School is a place where your child
not only learns skills such as reading and writing; it is also where
your child will learn about friendship, responsibility, and fairness.
In short, school is a test run for the 'real world', and your child
needs your help to navigate this complicated arena. When your child
was a baby, you set your life around nap times and diaper changes,
now your growing child needs you to set your life around school.
1.
Establish Consistent Routines
Take the 'year at a glance' approach. If you have a child starting
first grade and one in fourth, one a musician and the other an athlete,
then you must sketch out how you will achieve a balance between
school, their activities, your work, and your activities. It is
best to look at all of these areas at once, so that you can spot
the trouble areas. Once you have the big picture, it is time to
ask how you can set up a regular routine to ensure that everyone's
needs are met, including yours. Early in the school year, decide
which activities will fit, and which will have to be postponed.
One of the biggest areas of concern for modern families is activity
overload. Avoid it! Now that you know what activities you will be
engaged in, decide where homework fits and set a regular time for
it. Whether there are assignments or not, this should be the time
of day that your child always does a little extra school work. When
will you have dinner? If possible, make it at the same time everyday
and expect all family members to attend. Don't eat on the run! If
you have to eat in the car in order to make everything fit, then
you are doing too much!
2.
Set Reasonable Bedtimes
Open any magazine in America and you might find a story on the cumulative
sleep debt that Americans are suffering from. It causes accidents,
ill health, and poor work performance. It has the same effect on
young students. Without enough sleep, their learning suffers as
does their behavior. Additionally, lack of sleep makes kids prone
to getting sick, which means they miss school and get behind in
their learning. Avoid these problems by setting a reasonable bedtime
for your children and sticking to it. According to Dr. Jodi Mindell,
Ph.D., a member of the National Sleep Foundation, elementary age
children need between 10-12 hours of sleep each night. She also
recommends allowing an additional 10-20 minutes to that amount in
order to account for the time is takes your child to fall asleep.
Keeping these requirements in mind, your child's bedtime should
be no later than 8:30pm.
3.
Learn to Say No
There are many demands placed on our time. There are after school
opportunities galore: sports, music, drama, art, and more. Parents
have an equal number of options for after work activities. Parents
want to provide the best for their children and many believe that
giving them access to numerous opportunities is the best way to
enhance their learning. In fact, the best way to enhance a child's
learning is to allow them to slow down and think about what happened
in class and to talk to them about it. This type of reflection can
only come when parents and children have some downtime together.
I advocate the motto: "Just Do Nothing".
4.
Limit TV
Now, I'll be the first to admit that I love TV. I loved cartoons
as a kid, and I love sitcoms and drama shows now. But I'm careful
not to watch TV to the exclusion of all other forms of entertainment.
Kids are not as good at moderating their exposure to TV. They need
the help of their parents to make good choices and to limit the
time spent being a passive observer. Kids learn best when they are
actively involved in what they're doing. Reading, talking, exploring,
drawing, building, playing-these are all important parts of childhood.
Make sure that they don't get squeezed out by too much Scooby Doo.
5.
Encourage Reading
Research has shown that one of the greatest predictors of academic
success is the amount of time a student reads. When asked by the
parents of my students what they should do to help their child learn,
I always answer, "Get them to read." Books not only open
new worlds and ideas for children, they build their vocabulary,
improve their memory, grow their imagination, and teach them valuable
thinking skills. Time spent reading is an investment in your child's
future.
6.
Support Your Child's Teacher
It is an unfortunate fact of modern day society that teachers feel
less support from parents, administrations, and governments than
ever before. This is a shame, not only for the hard working teachers
who deserve to feel respected as professionals, but for the students
they teach. Students receive the best education when they are part
of a committed triumvirate. For a child to truly learn in school,
all three members of the team need to work together. The teacher,
student, and parents need to be all working towards the same goal
with commitment and help from one another. All parts of the triangle
must be connected for the goal to be met. Go against the tide-give
your child's teacher the respect she deserves and the support she
requires. Your child will thank you.
7.
Enlist Support
It truly does take a village to raise a child. Too often these days,
however, parents find themselves struggling to do it all with very
little support. If you live near grandparents, aunts, or uncles,
ask if they can occasionally go to the soccer game, or pick up the
art materials, or buy the new notebook. Very often it is the little
tasks that combine to make parents feel overwhelmed. Spreading the
small tasks around to willing volunteers may give you more time
to focus on the important aspects of the school year. If family
members aren't available to help, then exchange help with neighbors
and friends.
8.
Practice what you Preach
In order to make the school year go more smoothly, it is important
that your child is responsible, timely, and well-behaved. You are
far more likely to have a child who behaves this way, if you model
appropriate behavior for them. If you are frequently late, often
forget important items, and are stressed and irritable most of the
time, you are far more likely to have chronic problems with your
children-especially during the school year when time is tight. Give
your child the skills to succeed by working on them yourself. Nobody's
perfect, but if you show that you ask of yourself the same things
you ask of them, then you are more likely to garner their cooperation.
9.
Plan Ahead
If you fail to plan, then plan to fail. Harsh though that statement
may be, it often happens that you'd experience more success at school
if you'd take the time to plan ahead. If you know that your daughter
is going to appear in a play during the month of November, and that
it will require lots of rehearsals after school, don't enroll her
in tap class and swimming. When you know that time will be tight,
it also makes sense to speak to your child's teacher in order to
advise her of the situation and to get her help with scheduling
homework. Always keep in mind what is coming up next week and what
may be required due to the seasons. Getting to school in September
may not be much of an issue, but what will you do when the snow
flies?
10.
Keep your Eye on the Prize
Being committed to managing the school year well takes effort. Keeping
your family balanced despite all of the demands on everyone's time
can be difficult. All of it can be managed better if you always
stay focused on your purpose. Your purpose as a parent is to raise
well-adjusted children who can enter society and forge a good life
on their own. They need a good education in order to do this. How
to ensure that your child receives the best education possible ought
to be the first thing you think about in the morning and the thoughts
you keep as you close your eyes at night.
Knowing
that you've arranged your life around the essentials, despite how
hectic life can be, will greatly enhance your sense of satisfaction.
After all, as parents, it is rare that we receive kudos for a job
well done, so we must learn to put first things first and then congratulate
ourselves on our success.
Katie
Basson is a parent, teacher, and creator of The BITs Kit Better
Behavior Kit for Kids. Katie teaches seminars on behavior
modification techniques, and coaches parents through challenging
behavioral and educational issues. She is on the Board of Directors
of the YWCA and is an educational advisor to Zoesis, Inc., a children's
software company. Katie's expert advice has been sought for articles
in The Boston Globe and Parents Magazine. Sign up for her weekly
Parenting Solutions newsletter at www.bitskit.com
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